?

Log in

 
 
14 February 2007 @ 08:34 pm
Background Information  
THE GOLDEN LIGHT

In the beginning, there was nothing but darkness. Darkness, and the Golden Light.

Well, actually, the Cult of The Great Cheese doesn't believe that there ever was a Golden Light; there was and always will be the Omniscient and Omnipresent Great Cheese, and we can prove it to you scientificall--

THERE WAS A GOLDEN LIGHT, DAMMIT.

And the Golden Light shone down out of the darkness, down from the heavens, and smiled upon us, and did choose us to uphold its justice and fulfill not only our destiny, but others' as well--and thus we became known as the Call of God.

FUCK THIS SHIT. THERE ARE NO GODS. I'M AN ATHEIST. YOU CAN'T SHOVE THIS DOWN MY--

Please be taking the heretics away.

And now we, the Call of God, wander the world in the greatest age of all time, upholding justice and fulfilling destinies wherever we shall go--but more importantly, we search--

For suckers who'll give us easy jobs but lots of money?

No! We search again for the Golden Light, to complete the cycle and return to the heavens as gods!

------------------------


THE CALL OF GOD, CURRENTLY

Okay, well, actually, that guy's just a crazy nutter and we don't listen to him most of the time. That stuff about the Golden Light? Good for firetime stories when we've got lots of money, lots of food, and lots of free time to spare. Not so much when we're starving and cold and miserable and looking for someone to hire us.

Which is pretty much what we're doing most of the time.

We're a big happy family of cut-throat mercenaries. Yeah, we're still called the, uh, Call of God--

Bloody stupid name.

--though some men have been calling for a name change--

And get rid of that crap about the Golden Light! I mean, what the hell? Who listens to that sort of--

--and that, too.

Legend and name and questionable origins aside, everything we do, we do for the money. And we're no ordinary mercenary unit--we'll pretty much do anything. Fighting or not. So don't be surprised when we take up some rather, er, strange jobs.

I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN THAT TIME WHEN YOU MADE ME DRESS UP AS A DAMN PROSTITUTE! DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY MEN TRIED TO--

Shut up. We don't talk about that anymore.

Still want to join?

Welcome to the insanity, brother.

------------------------


THE CITY OF ASKELE

Hey! Welcome to the world!

Don't forget, everything's out to get you!

See that big splotch right on the banks of that river there? That's the Great City of Zamfhkeail'laf.

Okay, yeah, I sure as hell don't know how to pronounce it and no one else does, either. It's what's written on that big ugly dragon statue in the center of the city, but everyone calls the place Askele.

Don't ask me how "Askele" came from "Zamfhkeail'laf".

Let's get a closer look.

Hello! Ye Average Askele Citizen! Running around on the rooftops! People here use the rooftops a lot more often than the streets, because the streets are nasty nasty places. I can just see their thought process now. "Hey, look, a river in which we can conveniently get rid of all our shit! ...Let's dump our shit into the streets instead and let it rot there! Hooray!"

It sort of smells better in the marketplace. Sort of.

See that big huge ugly spiky thing towards the center of the city? No, that's not the dragon statue I was talking about but it's damn close to it. That's, er, what they call the Palace. Askele's part of the kingdom of Tukela and it's also the capital.

Which means King-like-sort-of-person lives here! He's not married, his first and last wife died without ever giving him children, so sad. (Eh.)

Something important: the nobles in this city make rats on a sinking ship look loyal.

Otherwise, hey! Welcome to your average medieval city! With a hundred times more pollution, mind you.

And disease.
And poverty.
And crime.

Yeah.
Lots of crime.

------------------------


MAGIC IN THIS WORLD

HI.
I love magic!
I laugh at those silly foolish mortals who actually have to light a fire with flint!

Mind you, even we mages still need the wood.

No fireball-flinging here (I'm working on it, though! I've been working on it for the past twenty years!). Or rains of death. Or huge spikes of ice. Or anything even vaguely violent, unless you're moving a knife from one end of the room to another and somehow it gets caught in someone else's head.

Mostly magic's really good for doing normal everyday things easily. Like lighting a fire from nothing but wood! (NO FLINT. HOW AMAZING IS THAT?) Or chopping up the onions without even having to be on the same side of the room! Or throwing your kids out the window when they get annoying! (So useful. So very useful.)

Very domestic magic here. Not as good as we'd like it--you still need wood for fire, water for ice, and so on, no magicking things out of thin air here, unless you count simple levitation--but all the same, it makes life easier.

Unfortunately, not everyone can do it. Why? Well, we haven't really figured out. It seems to be a randomly given trait, at birth.

Those crazy Call of God people claim it's because of he Yellow Light, or something, but no one believes them. Stupid foreigners.